Ramblings of a Young Aussie Writer

A writer lost in her own imagination

Love You More, Love You Most – A mum post — November 7, 2019

Love You More, Love You Most – A mum post

I’ve always heard people say that you’ll never love anything as much as you love your child, and that it’s a ‘different kind of love’ but I’ve always brushed it off. Then I had a small human. It took too long of a time to get this little creature but finally she’s earthside. And I kind of get it now.

We all have personality qualities that can be fantastic but terrible or even undesirable. I may be known to be fiery (I like to say passionate), unrivalled stubbornness and the word drama queen has been thrown around a few times. Then I had a child and suddenly there’s a mini me in the world. Sorry not sorry….

My fiery, stubborn princess is a force to be reckoned with (already!) and I adore her sass. She was tiny and only now is starting to get near average size for her age but how the hell her huge personality fits in such a tiny package, I’ll never know. I adore this wild little girl who loves me unconditionally (whilst simultaneously throwing food at me) BUT back we come to the love topic.

I was so scared I’d love my husband less. A terrifying thought because he is my universe. Well, turns out I don’t. It’s stupid how thankful I am for that, yet I am. I want to explain how I don’t believe the unwarranted advice from strangers is not the case at all. It took a good few months of having a new born to realise that I’m a human before I’m a mother. I know many people would chastise me for such a selfish statement but it’s true. There are two sides to me now – the mother, and the human. The mother side of me would burn the world to the ground for my daughter if needed. This is only one side of me, though. I am human. Not really something you can deny. Physically, I have necessary needs in order to function. There are also psychological needs as well, these are no less important (as I have learned). I have dealt with bad postnatal depression and anxiety – no shame, it happens. I nearly destroyed myself trying to function without getting the help I needed. Eventually, when I was nearly broken, I sought help. With the right help, I’m a better mother, wife and overall a better person. Postnatal depression should not be a taboo topic but that’s a story for another day. My husband is and always will be my sun. He is my strength, he picks me up when I’m not sure I can do it all anymore and he’s my rock. To my fiery, wild nature, he is a calm, laid back man.

I love my daughter in an indescribable way but the love I have for my husband has only increased. He is an amazing father and I’m in awe of how he handles our small human when I hit my breaking point. As a mother, I need to always be strong for my daughter, but he is MY strength and allows me to be weak. For that, I am incredibly thankful.

Maybe we shouldn’t be inferring that you will love your partner less once you have a child but instead tell people how your love can only deepen once you bring that tiny human into your lives. I find it more appropriate to say – if you think you can’t love your partner more, just wait until that tiny human makes an appearance.

Never Underestimate the Human Mind – Just For Laughs — November 3, 2019

Never Underestimate the Human Mind – Just For Laughs

Like most adults, my memory isn’t great. Ask me what I had for dinner last night and there’ll be a pause at best. ‘I’ve got a bad memory’ is basically a staple in most adult’s phrase book. There are some memories though that you’ll never forget – my wedding, the birth of my baby (okay, I hadn’t slept for a day but we’ll just say I kind of remember that) but then there’s the weird moments. Case in point –

I was 16 years old and at a Japanese boarding school. We had an Aussie teacher teaching us Japanese lessons. I remember his name clearly, Blake. There was one lesson where, for the entirety of it, he had snot dangling from his nose. I WILL NEVER FORGET THIS!!!! It’s still funny 15 years later. But WHY does this stupid memory in my mind block out so many possibly important ones. I don’t understand! I am glad though that that one silly memory can always make me giggle like a teenager.

To Blake, wherever in this world you may be, your slightly embarrassing situation has brought many giggles to me in the last 15 years so thank you.

What Drives A Human — October 21, 2019

What Drives A Human

I think that sometimes my mind wanders at the strangest times but when I have an idea, a thought, I get completely lost in it. One that came to me lately and has been bugging me ever since is the motives of human beings. I had a terrible thought whilst driving in the car with my husband and I couldn’t stop analysing it.

Are human’s innately selfish? Deep down, at the very core, are we just creatures driven by our own selfishness. A morbid thought but one that I can’t ignore. There isn’t much comradery around anymore and people will stampede others just to get some unnecessary item cheap or free. Let’s face it, the fuelling behind that is not a pretty one. I can’t sanctimoniously make such a declaration without admitting my own deep-rooted selfish desires. The scary part is that I worry that deep down, when survival relies on it, how long will our humanity last?

Broaching this theory with my husband, who I’m not sure is one to question the universe, I confessed that it was a discerning thought. His response – no, I think people are either driven by selfishness or love. It can be either.

As a man who will certainly not be the next Gandhi, I was surprised by his insight. This is a man who has experienced examples of how dark humans can really be, yet he makes me consider my theory, gives me hope that there’s more to humans.

I’m still analysing this theory, but my usually not contemplative husband has got a point. There are many cases that showcase a side to humanity that isn’t based off selfishness. Maybe I’m just a half empty kind of gal. I’m glad I’ve got a half/half kind of guy to change my perspective.

And I’m Back…… — October 16, 2019

And I’m Back……

After a long absence, I’m back! In my time away, I’m suddenly a lot older, not much wiser, started a new career and now have a tiny human to keep alive. So needless to say not too much has changed. Couped up with a toddler, I’ve sorely missed blogging and the need to share my daily child wrangling fun, writing experiences and crazy thoughts. My is burning into my fingertips yearn to document the crazy thoughts in my head.

Motherhood has changed me more than I thought it could. I didn’t realise that small humans were THAT helpless for THAT long! Being a stay at home mum has been bittersweet. I love my small human, she’s fantastic but I miss being able to be something other than a mum. I’m thankful that I’m studying my degree to be a teacher and have to use my intellect for more than just outsmarting a toddler.

Writing has taken a backseat as I focus on my degree, being domestic and wrangling the small human, and I’m devastated about that. I’m currently on a break which has given me the opportunity to fire up my blog again – even if it’s only for my own sanity.

My strange musings will be posted on this blog and I’d love to make blogging friends. Now to fix up the look of this blog and get writing!

Family!
The First Chapter — February 17, 2017

The First Chapter

Kindle and Apple ibooks have free eBook samples of many books and personally, I think it’s a fantastic idea. From a reader’s perspective, this is a great way to see if a book appeals to your interest before buying it. From an author’s perspective, I’d say this would put a lot more pressure on them to write a first chapter that will ensnare the reader into the story you’ve created.

For those who have had books traditionally published, they’ve already had to impress the publishing company to get their book published. The problem with that, is impressing a few people is a whole world different to impressing millions of people worldwide.

Without these free first chapter samples, the most important part was writing a blurb that would entice people to buy your book, especially on the eBook front. With these free exerts, the first chapter needs to be almost as good as the blurb but no pressure or anything.

On a positive note for authors, at least if someone reads the sample and decides the book is unappealing to them, they won’t be leaving a one star review.

Naturally, a fantastic first chapter doesn’t ensure a great storyline but hey, at least the first chapter was great.

Of course when it comes to print books, well, if the cover is great then at the very worst it will look good on your bookshelf.

 

 

3.5* Book Review – Iniquity by Amy A Bartol (The Premonition Series) — June 26, 2016

3.5* Book Review – Iniquity by Amy A Bartol (The Premonition Series)

Iniquity – The Premonition Series (Book 5)

Amy A Bartol

3.5 Star Review

I’ve finally finished the series that I thought would never end. I feel like it has dragged on for way too long. It just felt like overkill. I understand that as a writer, sometimes you love writing about those characters and that world so much you never want it to end but there needs to be a conclusion. It might be a bit of a spoiler but there were loose ends at the end of the book. Clearly, Amy Bartol has left a few things open just in case she wants to add a sixth book. *Groan*

Positives The cover is just beautiful – lets take a moment to appreciate that. I really enjoy Amy Bartol’s style of writing, probably most of the reason I persevered with this series (and of because of Reed). The basic storyline was great but I’ve heard that she doesn’t always plan her storyline when starting and I think that showed. I love Reed. How can you not? The ending certainly does him justice. Russell is really well developed and I wished he had had a bigger role in this book. I actually ended up liking Brennus which is no easy feat as I’ve wanted him to die from book one. You were shown very different sides to quite a few characters in this book. I did end up crying at the end of the book but that’s not too uncommon. Evie was well, Evie. There were quite a few moments where she certainly didn’t try that hard to deter some of her many admirers.

NegativesHow many admirers can one person have? Like seriously? I swear the count got up to seven. Yes you read correctly. Evie had a minimum of seven males obsessing over her. There was a lot of build up to a climax that just didn’t live up to it. A few pages and the spectacular climax scene was basically over. It was certainly a letdown. Especially considering this is the final book, the final fight scene. Buns, Brownie and Zee seemed like awkward add-ons in this book which was a shame. A lot of things that needed to be finished properly were just skimmed over. I enjoy finishing a book and still thinking about it days/weeks later but with this one I mostly just keep thinking of things that still confuse me. Whether they were unexplained or left too open, I’m not sure.

Overall I did enjoy this book and was glad it was the final one in the series. Would I recommend it to someone? Maybe. The series as a whole, I loved but it was really long-winded, that was its downfall for me (and of course the fact that there were more than a few handfuls of past, present and future lovers). The best bit – Reed. Now let’s take a moment to once again swoon over Reed. Ahhhh Reed, you gorgeous, perfect angel.

*All my reviews are on Goodreads too*

What the hell, Queensland? — August 4, 2015

What the hell, Queensland?

This is such an honest and shocking look into the reality of an unwanted dog.

thejessicafiles

awaiting_euthQueensland, wake up.

If you have ever surrendered a pet to a shelter or bred (even ‘accidentally’) & sold/given away puppies & kittens without being a licenced breeder with papered purebreds (backyard breeder) – you should be made to work in the a big animal shelter or pound for just ONE day. See if you can handle the outcome of your shitty behaviour. Maybe if you had to see your failure through to the end, actually take responsibility for your actions and kill the animals yourself, you would think differently – instead of telling yourself ‘he’s a good boy, someone will come for him, and at least I didn’t dump him on the road’ – they won’t come for him, and stop justifying what you’ve done just because you could have done worse. That’s like saying ‘well I stabbed the guy but I mean – at least I didn’t shoot him!’. Your pet…

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Haze by Paula Weston #2 in Rephaim Series 4 Star Review — June 29, 2015

Haze by Paula Weston #2 in Rephaim Series 4 Star Review

Haze – The Rephaim Book 2

Paula Weston

4 Star Review

As soon as I finished the first book Shadows, I absolutely had to start Haze straight away.

PositivesI loved the first book in the series Shadows and my high expectations of Haze were delightfully warranted. Gaby was more confident and stronger in this book. Thankfully she still held her attitude which makes her a more interesting protagonist. Rafa’s bipolar moods were a bit hard to keep up with but it makes him who he is. In some ways you can understand his conflicting emotions and the reasoning behind them although we won’t truly understand it until we find out what happened between the two before Gaby lost her memory. The storyline had some very real scenes that bring you back from the fantasy world and grounds the story. I often found myself awkwardly smiling or laughing from the witty remarks of Rafa and Gaby which means reading this book whilst in the company of others may incur some strange looks.

NegativesThe cover of a book is always a huge part as to why you would select it in a sea of millions of other books. Even though I really liked the cover of Shadows this cover was not great. I understand they wanted to follow a pattern with the covers but to me it looked like a trashy guy in track pants and no top with a sword on his back. It was too badly photoshopped on to be believable. Not a great way to entice readers but the shadowy wings, similar to the first cover, improve it. As much as I enjoyed this book, I found that there were a few scenes that weren’t explained enough and it made some parts hard to understand. There are also a few concepts that are difficult to comprehend but you get the general gist of it all. The real reason that I gave it only 4 stars though, is that I felt the plot was lacking a bit. The build-up was great and I was completely lost in the story but then it didn’t seem to end well. It was as though I was missing the end chapters. It’s great to end in a cliff-hanger but I think the storyline didn’t set up for such an extreme cliff-hanger to ended with.

Overall I’m very excited to read book three – Shimmer after finishing Haze. I’m very thankful I started reading the series now that three out of the four books are published. The ending of Haze would making waiting for Shimmer to be released, unbearable but luckily I’ll be starting Shimmer as soon as I finish this review. If you want to read a fantasy series with a difference then definitely try Shadows and of course you’ll be devouring Haze and Shimmer before you know what you’re doing.

BLURB –

“But what if we can’t find Jude?” 
He leans closer. His breath is warm on my ear. “We will.”
“How can you be so sure?” I want to believe him so badly, but this is Rafa. The guy who’s all action and no plan. His smile is tired, knowing. An echo of a shared past I don’t remember. 
“Because I’m not smart enough to give up, and you don’t know how to.” 

Gaby Winters’ nightmares have stopped but she still can’t remember her old life. Still can’t quite believe she is one of the Rephaim—the wingless half-angels who can shift from place to place, country to country, in the blink of an eye. That she was once the Rephaim’s best fighter. That demons exist. That Rafa has stayed. 

But most of all, she can’t quite believe that her twin brother, Jude, might be alive. 

And Gaby can’t explain the hesitancy that sidetracks the search for him, infuriates Rafa, and sends them, again, into the darkest danger.

A Court Of Thorns And Roses – Sarah J. Maas 4.5 Star Review — June 16, 2015

A Court Of Thorns And Roses – Sarah J. Maas 4.5 Star Review

A Court Of Thorns And Roses

Sarah J. Maas

4.5 Star Review

A Court Of Thorns And Roses Cover

I picked up this book because well, who isn’t reading it?

Positives I loved reading this book. It had all the wonderful aspects a great book should have. Sarah J. Maas has a beautiful style of writing which is enjoyable to read. The description in the book was wonderful but bordered on being overly descriptive. Tamlin *swoon* was gorgeous. How could you not love him? Feyre was a very strong character who faced all her problems head on making her a great female protagonist.

NegativesThis book has some aspects that are VERY similar to The Hunger Games books and Feyre could easily be confused with Katniss in quite a few parts. I understand that The Hunger Games series was amazing but I felt there needed to be a bit more originality. Apart from that though there wasn’t a lot else I could fault with the book. My only other issue was (without giving anything away) that I didn’t completely understand why Feyre didn’t do the one thing (that I felt was an obvious action) that could have fixed everything but then I guess the book would have been a lot shorter.

**Favourite Character Just for something a bit different I thought I’d add in a bit about my favourite. After I finished the book I was surprised to realise that my favourite character was actually Rhys (Rhysand) rather than Lucien or of course Tamlin or Feyre. I felt the reader (or maybe it was just me), could understand him and his motives much easier than Feyre seemed to. I can’t say anymore because I’d hate to give away any spoilers.

Overall If you love Beauty and the Beast as well as The Hunger Games then you will no doubt adore this book. Add in a Faerie theme and you get an enchanting fantasy book. I am super excited for the second book but I’m sure I have a long wait ahead of me.

BLURB –

When nineteen-year-old huntress Feyre kills a wolf in the woods, a beast-like creature arrives to demand retribution for it. Dragged to a treacherous magical land she only knows about from legends, Feyre discovers that her captor is not an animal, but Tamlin—one of the lethal, immortal faeries who once ruled their world.

As she dwells on his estate, her feelings for Tamlin transform from icy hostility into a fiery passion that burns through every lie and warning she’s been told about the beautiful, dangerous world of the Fae. But an ancient, wicked shadow grows over the faerie lands, and Feyre must find a way to stop it . . . or doom Tamlin—and his world—forever.

Twilight – Stephenie Meyer 5 Star Book Review — March 29, 2015

Twilight – Stephenie Meyer 5 Star Book Review

Twilight

Stephenie Meyer

5 Star Review

Finally I got around to reading Twilight (I know I’m only years late). Although a lot of people joke about both the books and movies, I personally found that it was well deserving of the fame it has gotten.

Positives I was shocked that I actually adored this book. The movies have certainly not done the books justice (although that is the case for most book – film conversions). Edward was a fantastic character and had a real sense of humour which the movie seemed to exclude. Stephenie’s writing style was enrapturing and really got you lost in her words.

NegativesAt one part in the book the timeline seemed to be off but apart from that I really didn’t find any other notable faults.

Overall The movies were great but the books are fantastic so if you’ve seen the movies then you definitely NEED to read the books. I would recommended these books to anyone. 5 Star Writing!

twilightcover