Ramblings of a Young Aussie Writer

A writer lost in her own imagination

Blogging the Controversial — February 25, 2020

Blogging the Controversial

Life happens, and in it’s wake every individual has a unique view on the world along with a collection of experiences that are unique to them. This means that people experience things that lead to controversial thoughts or views. Vygotsky believed in humans being shaped by their experiences and I strongly believe in that.

So…. Recently I experienced a death in my immediate family and I have strong views on that. I want to blog my views, I want people to read it and consider their views, but most of all I want it to be seen by those who may benefit from it. My desperate need to share my views about a controversial, triggering topic is something most people who blog have faced yet I’m still unsure if and when I should do it. I don’t want to cause harm with my views because that’s not the point of my writing but I also want to share my unique views and experiences on a touchy subject.

Being controversial doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Not everyone will agree with or even like your controversial views but if it resonates with just one person then isn’t it worth putting out there?

Love You More, Love You Most – A mum post — November 7, 2019

Love You More, Love You Most – A mum post

I’ve always heard people say that you’ll never love anything as much as you love your child, and that it’s a ‘different kind of love’ but I’ve always brushed it off. Then I had a small human. It took too long of a time to get this little creature but finally she’s earthside. And I kind of get it now.

We all have personality qualities that can be fantastic but terrible or even undesirable. I may be known to be fiery (I like to say passionate), unrivalled stubbornness and the word drama queen has been thrown around a few times. Then I had a child and suddenly there’s a mini me in the world. Sorry not sorry….

My fiery, stubborn princess is a force to be reckoned with (already!) and I adore her sass. She was tiny and only now is starting to get near average size for her age but how the hell her huge personality fits in such a tiny package, I’ll never know. I adore this wild little girl who loves me unconditionally (whilst simultaneously throwing food at me) BUT back we come to the love topic.

I was so scared I’d love my husband less. A terrifying thought because he is my universe. Well, turns out I don’t. It’s stupid how thankful I am for that, yet I am. I want to explain how I don’t believe the unwarranted advice from strangers is not the case at all. It took a good few months of having a new born to realise that I’m a human before I’m a mother. I know many people would chastise me for such a selfish statement but it’s true. There are two sides to me now – the mother, and the human. The mother side of me would burn the world to the ground for my daughter if needed. This is only one side of me, though. I am human. Not really something you can deny. Physically, I have necessary needs in order to function. There are also psychological needs as well, these are no less important (as I have learned). I have dealt with bad postnatal depression and anxiety – no shame, it happens. I nearly destroyed myself trying to function without getting the help I needed. Eventually, when I was nearly broken, I sought help. With the right help, I’m a better mother, wife and overall a better person. Postnatal depression should not be a taboo topic but that’s a story for another day. My husband is and always will be my sun. He is my strength, he picks me up when I’m not sure I can do it all anymore and he’s my rock. To my fiery, wild nature, he is a calm, laid back man.

I love my daughter in an indescribable way but the love I have for my husband has only increased. He is an amazing father and I’m in awe of how he handles our small human when I hit my breaking point. As a mother, I need to always be strong for my daughter, but he is MY strength and allows me to be weak. For that, I am incredibly thankful.

Maybe we shouldn’t be inferring that you will love your partner less once you have a child but instead tell people how your love can only deepen once you bring that tiny human into your lives. I find it more appropriate to say – if you think you can’t love your partner more, just wait until that tiny human makes an appearance.